Dear MX24 readers,
I am a 26-year-old wife. I married immediately after completing the university at 23 after taking advice from my family. It’s been 3 years since I got married and my marriage has been okay-ish till now. It’s reached a point where my marriage has stagnated. My husband and I are just there.
The first year of my marriage was simply amazing. Nobody could convince me otherwise that my husband loved me. He was everything anybody could wish for; showering me with gifts, random dates out of town and being at my every beck and call. My second year of marriage was when everything took a different turn. My university days and the things I did during that time caught up with me. The truth is I dated lots of men and even women in uni. I come from a very poor background, which is no excuse for some of the things that I did then, but not having as much of a financial backing as my mates did was what led me to do those things. I dated a lecturer once to get ahead of my class because I wasn’t able to meet my school fees deadline. One of my roommates, who later became my maid of honor realized my troubles and how hard it was for me and showed me the way. She confided in me about how difficult her own life was and what she was doing to stay alive.
It wasn’t something sinister, she just had one or two sugar daddies who supported her with money and asked if I was interested. I was more than broke during the time, no help was coming from anywhere and aside sorting out my fees I needed upkeep money so I gave in and said yes. She introduced me to friends of her big men and luckily I didn’t look my age, I looked more grown up which worked in my favor. I had only three sugar daddies during my time in the university. Just three. I stopped sleeping with my lecturer when I could pay my own fees and managed to stand on my own two feet with the help of these men. Before I got married, I cut ties with all these people and just focused on my husband but I believe karma has caught up with me because my husband met someone from my uni days who is a colleague at work and decided to brag about me to her. Mind you, I wasn’t very quiet about my lifestyle on campus.
He mentioned me in their conversation and women being women, she spilled all the things she knew about me, some she said she heard from people. Ever since my husband confronted me about those allegations, my marriage has not known peace. He hasn’t eaten my food, nor has he touched me. He doesn’t speak to me. He treats me like an outcast. I’m living with a stranger.
Aside that, it’s been 3 years and we still have no child. People are beginning to look at me funny and there is serious pressure from his family. I’ve apologized and tried to explain severally but all to no avail. I don’t know what to do and I’m afraid to bring outside people into this situation because I don’t want anybody to know of some of the things I used to do. I’ve been following your page and I’ve read some advice that is very plausible. How else do I reach out to him and let him understand that circumstances led me to do all those things, I’m different now. I don’t want to end up like those who marry and divorce in less than 5 years, I can’t be a divorcee before I’m 30. Kindly help out a young worried wife.
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